"Love, Porsche" Story

On this page is the story itself... If you are looking for the story overview, click here: Story Overview

Chapter 1: Where You Are

...Do you remember picking me up at the airport last December? My flight was bumpy but the thought of you kept my mind at peace. There you were, waiting with that beautiful smile and life in your eyes. We spent the week at my house completely in our own world, my family away on the East Coast. We rode around Orange County—shopped, dined, and had wine on the beach. The picture perfect adventure, the picture perfect California winter. These moments I wouldn’t trade for anything. When the sun set behind Table Rock, you asked if I had plans for New Years...

Chapter 2: See Through

...When the sun set behind Table Rock, you asked if I had plans for New Years. I told you I didn’t and that I’d let you know if something was happening. We didn’t speak the whole week after that night. New Years came around and the boys and I slipped into a party just after 10. A lot of people I knew were there—something I wasn’t upset over but neither thrilled about. I liked to keep to myself, stay off the grid. I found it’s better to know and have your business without others meddling in it. Having an interesting life is so much better when it’s private. Closer to midnight, I locked eyes with one girl that I’d seen around. She’d been glancing at me since I walked in and I knew it’d be her. Midnight made its way and you know how that went down. But the next moment, we were off in her car, gliding down the highway, headed back to the beach... 

Chapter 3: Deep Blue

...But the next moment, we were off in her car, gliding down the highway, headed back to the beach. It felt reminiscent of a summer night. Deep blue shades were everywhere. Her car, the sky, the ocean... The light from the moon lit the shore and the sea. We decided to swim, not a care in the world. Clothes off, no towels. Just life. We were living at a level most have never lived at. How free it felt to be in this moment...

Chapter 4: Moving On

...How free it felt to be in this moment until the moment was gone. We fell asleep on the shore, using our clothes and a spare blanket we brought down from her car as our only covering. Our bodies kept each other warm. That night, I dreamt more vividly than I had in a long time—borderline lucid. I was at the beach, doing the same thing I did this night, but with a different person—Heather. I was so happy in the dream, even happier than I was tonight. Toward the end of the dream, Heather fell out of my reach in the water. The sea washed us away from each other and I jolted up into reality. I woke up next to Auburn. Despite my startling body movements, Auburn stayed asleep, breathing heavily over my arm. It was 6am and the sun was coming up over the cliff. I had only been asleep for 3 hours. I reached for my phone out of the pocket of my pants and quickly sobered up to dozens of missed calls and texts...

Chapter 5: Bad Blood

...I reached for my phone out of the pocket of my pants and quickly sobered up to dozens of missed calls and texts from Jade and my friends. Everybody was wondering if I was okay and where I went. I remember telling Derek I was leaving the party with Auburn but he probably didn’t remember anything from that night. Jade was concerned about my well being but much more about who I left the party with. Apparently word travels quickly in the county. She seemed irritated and let down:

“Just tell me who it was—Heather? Chloe? That bitch Savannah from Nashville? Someone new??? Desirée said she didn’t recognize her...

That’s really annoying Porsche, we literally spent the whole last week together. I picked you up from the airport!!! I know we aren’t together but come on, you could have at least told me you were going to that party”

I understood her thinking... But what did I do wrong? I wasn’t in a relationship with anybody. Jade herself was the one who said she wasn’t interested in doing long distance right from the start. I was so confused—then it all clicked. You decided you were mine again as soon as I found my own happiness. Needless to say that’s just not how it works, love. And that’s how you create some bad blood. Just know, you were my best friend…

Chapter 6: Booty Call

...Just know, you were my best friend when we were together. It was a lifetime ago but sometimes it feels like yesterday. I’m not mad at you, but I feel a little disrespected when you hit me up to hang out at 11pm—considering everything we’ve been through. I wish I could have replied to your texts and calls, but I was out at the fair with Auburn. On the Sky Lift, she told me that you guys were friends when you were younger, but only catch up once a year now. Small world. Before I could ask why you guys don’t hang out anymore, we ran into Heather at the lift exit by the lemonade stand. Out of all people in the county…Heather and Auburn conversed briefly, pretending to be friendly. We all went to school at Nassan so we reminisced on the good old days and people we all knew. The conversation began to get a little too personal between the girls, and I sensed something was about to go south if I didn’t intervene. I pulled Auburn away and told Heather it was good to see her. I felt bad that I didn’t really catch up with her at all, but maybe it was for the best. The night went by in a flash. Before I knew it I was back in the house I grew up in. I fell asleep to blink-182 just like I used to… 

Chapter 7: Talking to Myself

...I fell asleep to blink-182 just like I used to and woke up to my phone buzzing uncontrollably by my head. The caller ID read “Heather” —a name I hadn’t seen on my phone in years. I thought maybe I was dreaming because I had just ran into her at the fair but it was real. I answered.

“Did I wake you up?”

“You might have”

“Not a thing has changed, you love your sleep”

“You know it’s my favorite thing in the world”

Heather and I talked for over an hour. We caught up on literally everything we missed over the past years, and it was surprisingly comforting and therapeutic. She apologized for the fair incident and said it wasn’t her intention to make me uncomfortable. She asked about Auburn and if we were seeing each other—I told her we had reconnected at the New Year’s party and that we were just passing time before I headed back to Nashville. Toward the end of the call, Heather invited me to a party at her friend’s beach house. I hesitated but told her I’d love to go. In that moment, everything I felt when I was with her came back to me. When we hung up, I sat on my bed in silence, absorbing those emotions. The passion was still there, but would we ever be able to see eye to eye? Dozens of thoughts and questions flooded my brain as I talked myself through it. Maybe now that we’re older, things will be different…

Chapter 8: On the Run

…Maybe now that we’re older, things will be different, I thought. I drove myself to the party, taking PCH down the coast. The scenery was beautiful. I felt a new life come over me, a sudden jolt of energy and happiness. It was electric and I knew the Higher Power was with me. A greater force was guiding me now and I wasn’t questioning anything—just going where the universe wanted to take me.

I parked on one of the side streets in the neighborhood a few blocks from the house. Heather ran out to meet me halfway and we walked into the party together. She was beaming with joy. 

The party was only great vibes, and this time, seeing people I knew from the past didn’t seem so bad. A few people came up to me complimenting my music and growth as an artist, which made the night even better. To my surprise, I bumped into Chloe, my childhood friend who I had a summer fling with before I met Heather. We thought we liked each other but realized soon after that we were definitely better as friends. 

Heather and Chloe used to dislike each other, but it seemed as if the past was behind them, and they were actually laughing and taking pictures together. Their interaction gave me peace.

I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect, but I could feel the night taking me somewhere familiar. The next thing I knew, Heather and I were making out in the stairwell leading down to the beach. Everything felt so right. We ran down to the beach and ultimately decided to book our own hotel room and leave the party. Within 20 minutes, the taxi picked us up and we were on our way…

Chapter 9: Mellow Man

…Within 20 minutes, the taxi picked us up and we were on our way to the hotel. There’s something magical about taking a taxi along the coast. We were also going to a spontaneous destination so it made the thrill even more pronounced. Heather and I felt like the main characters in our own movie. The universe was beaming on us. She laid her head on my lap for the second half of the ride while I stared out the window into the darkness, the waves crashing against the cliffs under the moonlight—the car flying past the silhouettes of palm trees as it winded down the road. 

“We’re here, Nassan Cliffs Resort” said the driver. I tipped him generously and Heather and I made our way through the entrance...

Chapter 10: Heaven

...Hand in hand, we walked up to the front desk smiling with joy. The person working must have felt connected to our energy because she was smiling too. Due to extra availability, she upgraded us to a mini suite on the top floor with a balcony overlooking the water, no extra charge. We made out the whole elevator ride up and without wasting any time, we fell on the bed as soon as we entered the room. We were in love again. It was absolutely perfect. The room, the lookout, the sound of the waves crashing, the ocean breeze coming through in front of the balcony. The bed was a giant cloud and we were lost in it. This had to be the closest thing to Heaven…

Chapter 11: Get Me

…This had to be the closest thing to Heaven—being lost in time with your first love. Nothing else mattered in those moments, and I hadn’t felt like this for years. The night lasted a lifetime but the next day also came sooner than I could process. It was my last full day in Orange County, and I wasn’t ready to leave. But I had to get back to school and the music. The team was waiting for me too. Instead of dread our inevitable separation, Heather and I decided to enjoy our last day in Orange County. We visited our favorite spots from when we dated—Strands Beach, Nassan Lake, Harbor House, etc. While at Harbor House I could have sworn I saw Jade out of the corner of my eye looking through the window, but when I turned to look I only saw streetlights and a few cars on the road. Maybe I imagined it. I had a fleeting thought about Auburn too, but it quickly became distant. This is where I was meant to be. This is the person I love. I didn’t want anything more. I had everything in this moment...

Chapter 12: Bambi

...I had everything in this moment. The day and night were bittersweet. It was hard to process all the emotions I was feeling. Why would God lead me back to my person only for me to go back across the country alone again? My mind was a war field but I tried my best to be in the moment and appreciate the short time left. We went back to my neighborhood as it was getting dark. We watched the deer roam the canyon by my house from the lookout at the top of the park. We used to lay out in the grass field on a blanket and look at the stars, listen to our favorite music and talk about our dreams and futures. It was also where Heather had her first sip of alcohol and her first (and only) cigarette. The deer passed through the brush and were on their way to wherever they rested for the night. Heather and I shared a long hug and kiss goodbye and she told me she’d see me in the morning. I walked back to my house with a heavy heart as she drove away…

Chapter 13: Speak From Your Heart

…I walked back to my house with a heavy heart as she drove away and packed my bags for my return trip to Nashville. I said goodbye to my family, as I would be up and gone before any of them awoke the next day. 6am made its way quicker than I expected and Heather was waiting outside in her white, old school jeep. The roof was off just like it always was when we dated. I loaded my bags in the back and hopped in the passenger seat. The drive to the airport was quiet. Heather and I didn’t always need to talk to each other to feel each other’s presence and be together. We were just happy to be around each other. When I was younger I didn’t quite understand this, and this caused a lot of petty arguments that I wish we never had. But now, I understood it. When we pulled up to John Wayne Airport, Heather brought the car off to a spot in the parking garage. I was early for my flight so we had time to talk. We both knew we couldn’t do long distance but we decided that it wouldn’t keep us from staying in touch. 

“College will go by in a flash. I’m not going anywhere. And when you’re back for break again, you can come visit me in San Diego”

You’re right. This is such a small window of time in our lives

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m yours. I was then and I am now. I love you, Porsche”

Heather drove me to the front of the airport and we kissed goodbye. After getting through security I texted her “I love you” and told her to check the glove box in her car. Inside was a letter with a salutation that read “Love, Porsche”...

Chapter 14: You Changed

...I boarded my flight, rested my eyes, and woke up in a flash to the captains voice across the intercom: "Flight 261 to Nashville will be landing shortly. Local time is about 3pm… Thank you for flying Promised Land Airlines…"

As I walked out of the airport into the arrivals area outside, I felt the shift in the air and respectively, my mood. It was like I was a different person, and for all anyone here knew, my life in Orange County was just as boring as life was for them in their hometowns. I brought my secrets with me to another car awaiting my arrival—this time with “Savannah from Nashville”—behind the wheel. 

We greeted each other but before I could even speak with her, I answered my phone to an unsettling call. We drove for a few minutes and as soon as I hung up, I realized another story was already unfolding…

Love, Porsche